How do romance scams work, and how much do they cost?

A romance scam is a confidence trick in which someone pretends to feel romantic interest, wins the victim's affection, and then uses that goodwill to get money or to commit fraud against the victim. The relationship is the product. Messages can go on for months, sometimes even a year, before the scammer asks for money, once they feel the victim is connected enough to say yes.

Profiles are built from stolen photographs or AI-generated images of attractive people, a practice often called catfishing. Because the scammers look nothing like the photos, they rarely meet the victim face to face or on video, and offer excuses like travelling or a broken web camera. They ask many questions, share little about themselves, and shower the victim with compliments. Some pose as US military members, because that explains why they are never available to meet. Scammers often work in groups, so someone can always be online, and a rotation of people all claiming to be the same person is hard to spot in text.

The cost is large, and the official figures are rising. In 2025 the FBI's Internet Crime Complaint Center logged 23,159 complaints in its confidence/romance fraud category, with reported losses of $929,287,469, up from $672,009,052 in 2024. The figures cover only what is reported, and the stigma of being deceived may deter victims from reporting. Many victims, even when shown strong evidence, cannot bring themselves to believe that the person who seems so loving is a criminal.